Friday, April 16, 2010

this is why i'm hott

i made up a new word today.



put your hands together fooorrrr...


har·dyharharcis·sist n.

  1. the attribute of the human psyche charactized by complete & utter admiration of oneself while simultaneously maintaining the ability (because you're so awesome, duh) to take a joke

simply put, a hardy-har-har-cissist is a narcissist that doesn't take himself/herself too seriously.



yes. i realize that this concept is a complete oxymoron.
that's the point.
that's why we NEEDED THIS WORD.



i love myself. i pretty much think i'm the funniest person alive.
i mean, why else would i have started a blog?


"what? you think i'm funny, too? oh, stop...you're making me blush!"



did i tell you that i'm also very intelligent [read: clever, witty, unmatched in brainpower]?


for those of you who don't bear the burden of being the smartest person alive, here is an easy to read explanation of why my word is so mind-blowing-ly awesome.



here is a compilation of the most accurate definitions of "hardy-har-har" that the world wide web has to offer

this particular one is my favorite [read: this one best satisfies my ego by proving the point i'm in the process of making]

"when something is funny, but is directed at you as a insult, shrug it off by saying hardy har har"


narcissists lack the ability to shrug things off. this is why they suck.

HARDY-HAR-HAR-CISSISTS, on the other hand, have an amazing sense of humor
(and obviously know full well that any insult directed their way is obviously just a result of extreme jealousy brought on by the fact that [insert hardy-har-har-cissist here] is the coolest person ever & that [insert jealous, not-so-cool person here]'s biggest accomplishment won't even live up to the hardy-har-har-cissist's biggest failure.)

want to tell me how much you hate me/i suck at life/smell/etc/etc/etc?

bring it on.
you're just fanning the fire.


hardy-har-harcissist is the better narcissist.


and it rhymes.





...with all that being said, if you don't tell me how much you love this post or tell me how hott my new facebook picture is i may cry myself to sleep every night until my body shrivels up like a raisin because i have drained every god-forsaken drop of water filtrating throughout my being out of my tear ducts.

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